Children's Journals

This is my journal, with posts mainly about myself. If you want to see posts specifically about Maia or Liam, check out the links to their journals under the "My Interests" section on the right side of my blog page.

Belly Picture Comparison

View Belly Picture Camparison for Second Pregnancy!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Goodbye Grandpop

As I sit here, with my mind still fresh from the other family losses less than two months ago, I am filled with even more sadness over this latest loss. My paternal Grandfather, Robert Ogbin, finally passed away at 5:00am this morning. He was 92 and had been in a nursing home for several years, suffering from Parkinson's and dementia. Even though it felt like he had gone a while ago, not really living in the present world, it still hurts that he's gone now. That they are all gone. That I've gone from four grandparents and a great grandparent to just one single grandparent...my maternal grandmother. The great/grandmothers were sudden, and the one was definitely unexpected...no time for goodbyes. The other two spent last year+ of their lives wasting away, not able to even really enjoy it the way they should be able to. It all seems so unfair, and a waste...and so I cry, cry over the unfairness of it all. The loss of four loved ones, in only two months. Makes me wonder why...why life does this? But I already know the answer...life doesn't DO anything...it just is. Stuff happens. Life doesn't do fairness or unfairness. You just need to live it while you can. So I am going to quote some words from a new Ozzy song that I am currently addicted to, and tell everyone to go live your life as much as you can, right now...

"Every second you throw away
Every minute of every day
Don't get caught in a myriad
Because life won't wait for you
No, life won't wait for you, my friend."
            - Ozzy Osbourne, "Life Won't Wait"


Sorry for the crappy picture, it's the best I can find right now.
From Sandy and Travis' wedding - he's in the wheel chair.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Autumnal Equinox

Today is the autumnal equinox. Day and night are of equal lengths. Night and day are even. The first day of autumn. And this one is marked by a full moon. The harvest moon. Pretty amazing!
Happy Autumn, everyone!

Monday, September 20, 2010

10 Weeks

Today I am 10 weeks pregnant. I'll mark the occasion by posting my first belly picture and some baby info.



Baby: The baby is only the size of a plum, but he (or she) is growing every day. He/she is out of the "embryonic stage" and entering the "fetal stage." Fingers are separating this week, and webbed toes will soon follow. Baby's tail is quickly disappearing, too.

Me: I have been feeling very tired, very worn out. I've had a few icky feeling mornings, but that is about it. No actual sickness. I am definitely showing a little belly, although when I look straight on in a mirror it really just looks like I am slightly fat. *sigh* I want to get a bit bigger so that it's obvious I look pregnant. And I want to feel that baby flutter kick in there.
I'll try to post belly pictures every two weeks. And at some point I'll include a link on the right to a page that just has belly pics for comparison.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Some milestones

Yesterday I hit two milestones in pregnancy (well, what I am calling milestones...just things that happen during pregnancy at some point).
First, I started wearing my maternity pants. Gave up trying to squeeze myself into pants that were hard to zipper up and button closed. So I got down the bag of pants (forgot I had so many of them), and threw on my favorite pair of corduroys. SO much better, comfy. And one more step to making it even more real (still a little bit a of a surprise, and surreal).

Second...a familiar feeling. I was sitting at my work desk, noticing a sensation that kept recurring. But I was distracted by work and so wasn't really thinking about it. I've been wondering when I would feel the baby flickering around in there, and so part of my brain kept straying to that. But that didn't make sense with the sensations I was feeling. I finally gave it some more thought. My lower belly was tightening, and then that tightness was kind of rolling down through my belly. Then it hit me. Braxton Hicks! I was having Braxton Hicks! Wait...at 9w3d (9 weeks 3 days)? Um, isn't that WAY too early? I know I felt them early last time, but that was still at 17w2d. This is 8 weeks earlier than that. So I grew a little concerned and looked it up online...and was relieved. Apparently Braxton Hicks start up around about 6 weeks, but usually they aren't felt until past the halfway point in pregnancy, after 20 weeks. Some women don't feel them at all. Some feel them sooner. And SOME apparently do feel them as early as their second month, which I have just passed out of. So it's not uncommon to feel them this soon. And usually the second time around women apparently feel them a bit stronger. So it all jives. So, it's all okay. And I am feeling Braxton Hicks. Already. Wow! Now THAT makes it a lot more real. A familiar sensation from last time. Kind of neat. I still haven't felt the baby move and can't wait until that finally happens, but I probably have another month before that happens, even my second time around. I'll post when I notice.

YAY! Pregnant!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Too much going on

I know, I haven't really been posting all that much. Haven't been keeping you up-to-date on my pregnancy, haven't been posting about the stuff going on, or the things I have been meaning to post about. I want to post about some of the knitting projects I've done, and some things I've experienced, that occurred before this journal came into being. I want to talk about stuff going on recently (like fixing our foundation and getting a new patio with pavers). I want to keep everyone updated on my pregnancy.

I promise to post more, and to include pictures. Regarding the pregnancy, everything is going well. I am currently 9w 2d (9 weeks and 2 days). Still in the first trimester, but only a few weeks away from the second. The baby is doing well, at least as of my last appointment. Saw the little one moving around, waving its paddle arms, measuring at almost an inch long (about 5 days larger than expected). Aside from really being exhausted and not really having an appetite for much, I am doing well. Already starting to swell a bit and there are some pants that I can no longer wear. Guess I need to break out the maternity wear already.

Before I go, I do want to say/ask one more thing. Does anyone read these? Is there anyone out there actually taking the time to read any of my posts? Or am I just posting to the thin air of the Internet? I know Danamarie reads when she has time and will sometimes comment, but I know right now she is busy with a show. Do any of my family members take time to read my thoughts? I would LOVE to actually see comments to my posts...from family, from friends. So if you ARE reading these...PLEASE leave a comment now and then. Even if it's just a hello because you don't know what else to say.
Thanks.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

My little boy

He is no longer quite so little. I can't call him a toddler anymore. Check out his journal, linked on the right, for today's post (September 12th), and see what I mean.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

New Life

In the course of 2 weeks I lost three family members. A very sad time, filled with regrets, heartache, and many tears. But in the midst of that sadness comes some happiness. Sometimes as one life ends, another begins. Somewhere in the midst of all this loss...I became pregnant.

Pregnant. I am pregnant again. New life is growing inside me. A miracle has occurred. And this time, it happened without a lot of effort, without a lot of fuss, without taking 2.5 years. Life just working as it is supposed to. And maybe helping to somewhat ease the pain of these last few months.

Pregnant. I still can't quite believe it. Even after seeing the little bright circle of growing life on the ultrasound, it seems a little unreal. But I'll take it...such an amazing surprise, right when it was needed most. Thank you.

My due date is April 18th. I am currently a little over 7 weeks along. I will be happy with either a boy or a girl and want to be surprised this time.
I'll try to attach my ticker somewhere on this journal and will post with updates and such.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Memories of Oscar from his grandchildren

Again, I asked my sisters and cousins for memories of Grandpop throughout our childhood. Please share them with us.


We Remember...
…Grandpop’s ribs. They were the best ever, and nothing will ever compare to them.
…Playing in his backyard, under the weeping willow tree, in the hammock, with the horseshoes, and around the pear tree.
…Eating corn on the cob and sitting at that old wooden picnic table outside, trying to avoid the splinters.
…Helping to decorate the Christmas tree at their house, while watching a Christmas movie in the background.
…His Christmas ham dinners, with lots of goodies to go along.
…Climbing over the back fence to get to the playground (the fast way).
…Helping him to make pasta from scratch. He would roll it out and then hang it to try on lines of string in the house. Of course, our helping meant us eating the raw spaghetti dough strands.
…Easter egg hunts in the backyard.
…Playing on his old computers.
…Thanksgiving dinners at his house. The huge long table with everyone squeezing in around it, and the awesome turkey, and of course the little things like olives and pickles. And Grandpop saying grace before we stuffed ourselves, forgetting to make room for dessert.
…That he traveled to many places, and listening to him talk about them always seemed like amazing stories of far-away places.
…Thinking that the upstairs was like a secret attic, because we hardly went up there.
…Going to the zoo together in his little car, and witnessing some rather naughty monkeys peeing on the car.
…Playing out on the front porch, which always seemed huge.
…Flying in his little airplane…at first too afraid to get on, then changing our mind last-minute.
…His amazingly strong sauerkraut.
…The way he listened to what was happening in our lives, and was genuinely interested.
...His humor.
…His deep laugh and his big smile.
…His amazing and loving hugs. Even at the very end.


We love you Grandpop. We will always remember you.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Passing of Oscar Semora

My Grandfather was a strong fighter all the way, but he finally lost his battle with cancer this past Thursday (August 12th) at 12:07am. I would have posted sooner but I was away at Pennsic when it happened and am only now just finding time to get on my journal. Again, I don't know that I have the words to express feelings. And I feel so drained with everything going on, I can't even cry all that much. Which feels really wrong. I am very sad that yet another person is no longer in my life, that I will no longer be able to see and talk to this man. All of my regrets from my earlier post titled as such...they are still there, only now it's worse because it's definitely too late. I essentially have one grandparent left with which to share my life with, and to find out more about - my one surviving grandmother. My one surviving grandfather unfortunately doesn't even know I am there if I visit.

Anyway, since I don't know what to say just yet about my grandfather (memories of him are forthcoming), I will post his obituary here.

Oscar W. Semora, Jr., age 79 of Gibbstown, NJ passed away Thursday, August 12, 2010. Born in Pine Bluff, Arkansas he is the beloved husband of Eleanor M. (nee Wilson) and beloved father of Susan Semora of Suffolk, VA, Debra Ogbin & husband Robert of Pittsgrove, NJ, Barbara Baran & husband Matt of Little Rock, AR, Linda Morrow of Sherwood, AR, Wayne Semora of Orlando, FL. Lisa Higgins & husband Robert of Media, PA., brother Raymond & wife Chris of MI, sister Barbara Ann of Sherwood, AR, 11 grandchildren & 4 great grandchildren.
Oscar served in the US Army Occupation Forces in Germany. In 1959 he joined NAESU as a Tech Rep. in Washington DC, later transferring to Philadelphia in 1966. He was dedicated to furthering Naval Aviation throughout the years, earning the respect of many. In 1978 he received the NAESU Equal Opportunity award. He was appointed NAESU's first Technical Director in 1994 and retired in 1996. Oscar enjoyed flying his own airplane and was a member of the Masons and the Gibbstown Senior Citizens Organization.

Pennsic Post Postponed

I do plan to post about my Pennsic trip, but right now I have more important things to post about. So check back in the weeks to come for the Pennsic stuff.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Further Loss

Sadly, my Great Grandmother, Gladys Semora, passed away this morning, after suffering a heart attack. She was 95. I am too tired and emotionally drained to find eloquent words to say about this latest sadness. I certainly wish I had known her better. She lived in Arkansas, I lived in NJ most of my life. I remember her mainly from the few visits made over the year, but I haven't seen her since February 2008, right before Liam turned 1. She had the Arkansas twang accent, and she was very self-sufficient. I want to be like her, living so strong and so long. I am sad that she has gone, but I know she has live a long, full life and she has moved on to something new, something different.

For those whom are suffering greatly from this new loss, I am very sorry...and I am here if you need me.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Memories of Gladys from her grandchildren

I asked my sisters/cousins to come up with some memories of Grandmom, to add to mine and to share with everyone. They delivered. Here they are (in no particular order). Please take time to enjoy them .


  • Lots and lots of swimming.

  • Doing flips off the side of the pool.

  • Eating watermelon until we were covered in red sticky juice and jumping in the pool to clean off.

  • Using the "window" from the laundry room into the back room for games and the like.

  • Sleep-overs at her house, lots-o-girls in one bed!

  • Gram's variety of pickles. I used to think her house was the only place you could get those cute little pickles. I thought the rest of the world had to have dill, only Gram had variety.

  • Her sweet iced tea; like the pickles, I thought it was tea you could only get at her house.

  • Eating Little Ceasars (Pizza! Pizza!) around her bar.

  • Playing at the playground at Bethel Mill Park.

  • Feeding the ducks at Bethel Mill Park, then racing to get into the pool as soon as we got back.

  • Playing with her touch-lamp.

  • Night-time pool swimming adventures (bathing suits optional?).

  • Eating out at Friendly's.

  • Waiting there overnight while mom was in labor with Sandy. And then being told she had been born (and thinking they had named her after a beach).

  • When we would leave, grandma and grandpa would stand at the front door and wave until you couldn't see them anymore.

  • She was completely fine with tons of people invading her home almost every single weekend in summer to use her pool.

  • Hanging out in the pool under the diving board while we were taking turns jumping.

  • Changing in the smallest, hottest shed ever!

  • Her voice. Can't describe it. Just felt...warm, and alive.

  • Partying up at the anniversary around the corner from Cindy's (it was like a block party).

  • Playing mermaid and never wanting to get out of the pool.

  • Watching fireworks down at the school or from the pool during summer.

  • Having to put on sunscreen in the car on the way over so we could go swimming right away.

  • Being given the priviledge of spraying water into the birdbath.

  • Waiting 30 minutes (an eternity) after we ate to go back into the pool.

  • Trying not to drip water on the floor when you had to go in and use the bathroom (because the chlorine would ruin the carpet).

  • Her perfume (smelled like the "Musky Jasmine" scent from Love's perfume)

  • The candy dishes around the house with different candies in them.

  • Hated the squishy toilet when you came in from the pool, and your legs stuck to the seat. And it was always cold because of the A/C vent right above you.

  • Whitey used to swim with us.

  • Wanting to pop the "bubbles" on the pool cover (like BIG bubble wrap), and wanting to walk across it.

  • The park and waterfalls.

  • Playing the games that she kept in the hot, dark shed.

  • Swimming under the Chinese lanterns.

  • That statue of the little boy holding the lantern in the from of the yard (kept changing colors).

  • Grandmom taking me to Friendly's, and me throwing up all over the table, and her taking me home and giving me a blanket (I was traumatized from Friendly's for a while after that).

  • I remember seeing our Christmas presents behind a chair once...a few Sprites from Rainbow Brite and a Lurkey doll. When we opened them up the next morning, I was disappointed that all my sisters got Sprites and I got the Lurkey doll.

  • Being amazed at how tan she was.

  • Sitting at the bar and thinking it was cool (and grown-up).

  • Mike shattering one of the glass tables by putting the candy back on it too hard.

  • Trick-or-treating in the neighborhood and being terrified of the person next door (I think because of some scary movie inside, or some sort of decoration...or maybe it was the rubber mask with the axe through the head).

  • My (Kim's) bridal shower was held there.

  • Christmas mornings with the whole family. Super-long table in the living room, across from Grandpop's old record player.


  • Gladys Ogbin (04/06/1926 - 07/29/2010)

    Her obituary:
    Gladys M. Ogbin (nee Morris) age 84 years of Sewell died Thursday July 29, 2010 in Underwood Memorial Hospital, Woodbury. Mrs. Ogbin was born in Philadelphia, raised in Pennsville and lived in Oak Valley for many years. She worked as a Secretary at DuPont Repauno Works, Gibbstown and she was a member of the Oak Valley Athletic Association. Mrs. Ogbin enjoyed reading and traveling in her free time. She is survived by her beloved husband of 62 years, Robert Ogbin; her children, Robert G. and Debra Ogbin of Pittsgrove, Cynthia Ogbin of Sewell, Linda and Bud Rendfrey of Dunnellon, Florida, Michael and Lynne Ogbin of Logan Twp., Jeffrey and Nancy Ogbin of Oak Valley and Donald Ogbin of Oak Valley; 13 grandchildren and 7 great grandchildren. A Memorial Service will be held at a later date. Arrangements by McBride - Foley Funeral Home, Paulsboro. Contributions can be made in her memory to Shady Lane Recreation Department, P.O. Box 275, Clarksboro, NJ 08020 or South Jersey Animal Rescue, 129 Bell Avenue, Mt. Royal, NJ 08061. Memories can be shared at www.mcbridefoleyfh.com.

    Thursday, July 29, 2010

    Loss

    Gladys Ogbin and Liam, May 2007
    Early this morning, my paternal grandmother, Gladys Ogbin, passed away unexpectedly. I had only just found out 12 hours earlier that she was suffering kidney failure and would be put on dialysis. I was just squaring myself up to the fact that her time could be over soon and that I really needed to try to visit her more. As mentioned in my previous post, I was already suffering guilt at how little time I had spent with my maternal grandfather, Oscar. I hadn't seen my grandmother/Gladys since May, and hadn't seen my paternal grandfather, Robert Ogbin (same as my dad), in...well...I can't even remember. Shamefully it may have been a year or more. He's been in a nursing home for a few years, suffering from Parkinson's and dementia. I hadn't visited partly because it's not all that close, and partly because I know he really doesn't know I am there. But what kind of excuse is that? I should still have visited, and I could have at least gone for the benefit of my grandmother/Gladys, who was there on a daily basis watching over him.
    Both my paternal grandparents had been admitted to the hospital over the weekend. My grandfather/Robert supposedly had pneumonia, and my grandmother/Gladys was jaundiced and feeling poorly, and blood tests showed some issues that needed to be addressed. I was working on figuring out when I could start visiting more often, and the things I wanted to talk about, to ask.
    And then I got the call this morning. Grandmom had passed away early in the morning. They hadn't even gotten a chance to try the dialysis. She was gone. I had most definitely missed out on my chance here. The last one of the three we expected to go was the first to go. Without even a chance to say goodbye really. And I experienced my first real sense of loss. Those first stabbing pains of realization that I will never, EVER have the chance of seeing this person alive again. It almost seems surreal, even having seen her lying there in the hospital...as if maybe it wasn't really her.

    And I know that in the next few weeks, I will be losing both my grandfathers for sure...and I will have to endure that, too. I knew I would eventually lose my grandparents...people don't live forever. And I was prepared (as one can be) for the loss of either of my grandfathers, at some point. But to have all three go in such close proximity...

    Oh god, I can't even figure out what I want to say anymore. I keep typing and deleting my thoughts. I feel like this moment deserves something deep and profound, but I can't seem to write that way. I don't know what to say. I can just be...I have lost my grandmother, and I am sad.

    Monday, July 26, 2010

    Regrets

    I, like all people, have lots of regrets about lots of stuff. Some is stupid stuff. Some are a bit more substantial. Some have me crying over and over again, causing me to stare through blurry eyes at my laptop screen while trying not to be overheard by my coworkers around me.
    I am losing my grandfather. He was diagnosed with cancer about a year ago, and over that past year it's slowly been stealing him away. He is nearing the end of his time with us, and I find myself hurting with regret. I think of all those family get-togethers where I said my hellos, asked a few questions, and then drifted over to my cousins or sisters, where I felt I had more in common and the conversations were easier. I know that's what happens, that I am not the only one that does that. But now I am angry at myself about it. I should have spent more time talking to my grandfather. Telling him about the happenings in my life. Find out what is going on with him. Find out more about him, what he liked to do, etc. What DID he like to do? I know he loved cooking. We used to go to his house for Thanksgiving dinners, and the food was always awesome. I remember as a child going to his house and helping him make pasta. I don't mean taking a package of hard pasta and throwing it into a pot. I mean Grandpop making his own pasta dough and rolling it out (or extruding it, whatever that process is), and hanging the spaghetti strands up on line to dry in the kitchen. My sisters and I would help by eating some of the raw pastas.
    What else did he like to do? I don't really know. I know he traveled, at least some. I remember my mom mentioning things he would bring back from some trips. But I don't really know if it was a lot of traveling, or just the basic traveling we all do. I think he was in something military-related, but I couldn't really tell you what.

    I feel like I wasted my time with him. I selfishly told him about some of the things going on with me during those family get-togethers, and didn't even take the time to find out much about him. And soon he will be gone. He is a shadow of who he used to be, confined to a bed and looking like he weighs less than I do now. He still had his humor when I talked to him this weekend, but that almost makes it harder, knowing that he is fully aware of what is going on. Maybe it would be easier if he was lying in a stupor, clueless. But then I wouldn't even have a chance to find out at least something more about him. Darn it, even now I am berating myself for not asking him more things when I visited him this weekend. Not finding out a little bit more about this wonderful man who helped give birth to and raise my mother. This man who I have a little bit of in me. What part of him do I have? What traits are like his traits? I am SO not ready to lose him. I want more time. I need more time.
    Please.

    I love you, Grandpop. And I am sorry.

    Wednesday, July 21, 2010

    Blood, blood, everywhere

    Okay, well maybe not EVERYWHERE. Although it looked like it at first. All over the sheets. On the bed frame. On Emily…

    Oh…what I am talking about? Hehheh. Sorry. No, it’s not a slasher flick. I am talking about Liam’s night-time nosebleed. I had just put him down for bed, and was downstairs for less than 3 minutes (getting ready to finally start some Pennsic sewing) when I heard him call to me in some distress. Sighing, I went back into his room, asking him what was wrong. “Boogers, Mommy. Lots of boogers”, he informed me in a teary voice. I sighed again at how dramatic my son could be over a runny nose and fetched a tissue. Upon handing it to him, though, I noticed dark spots on the sheets in the light of the nightlight. Crap. Sure enough, turning on the light revealed that he had a nosebleed. There were splotches all over the sheets and he had managed to smear it all over his face and both arms, and had rubbed it all over Emily’s face (she is his stuffed ermine…a white weasel for those unfamiliar). He had even managed to get some of the bars of his modified crib. I spent the next half hour cleaning up, as it took a while for the bleeding to stop, and I had to comfort him and give him an ice-pop to help apply ice to the area (or as close as possible) and to give him something to keep his mind occupied, while I changed the sheets on his bed. Then it was back to bed, and I then had to scrub the blood stains out of the sheets and Emily (note: cold water and rubbing salt into the stain works great apparently). And now I am finally done.

    So much for getting some sewing done tonight.

    Monday, July 12, 2010

    Why the rush?

    On Saturday I was driving home, coming back from yoga in Medford. I came up to the light at Route 38, and as I approached it, I was faced with the dilemma of what lane to get in (as I always am). Both the left lane and the middle lane went straight, but the left lane also allowed left turns onto 38. There was one car in the left lane already (no signal though), and two in the middle lane, one of which I had been behind most of the way and was rather slow. If I got into the left lane, I might be able to pass that car since it would probably start off really slow. But if the car in the left lane was turning left, then I would probably get stuck there waiting for oncoming traffic to pass before the car in front of me could turn. I picked the left lane, and when the light turned green, the car in front of me sped across the intersection, and the two cars in the middle lane slowly churned into action. I was across the intersection before both of them, no problem.

    Fast forward to me coming home from work today. I again came up to a light, with three lanes, all of which go straight through the light, but first the right and then the middle lane go away, coming down to one lane. I usually get in either the left or middle lane, as I hate trying to pass in the right lane, when it's main purpose is to allow people to turn right into the medical facility immediately after the light. And I have to end up in the left lane anyway. Yet, every time I come up to this light, I have to decide which lane is the better one to be in...which has the potential of moving the fastest. And if I choose the wrong one, I get annoyed. And even if I choose the faster one, sometimes there is someone that comes shooting along in that far right lane, past everyone. And I find myself thinking "hey, they were behind me....they aren't supposed to cut in line!"
    And then I realize...am I much better? I also try to push it a little...perhaps not as rudely...but I do what I do in the name of speed. So that I can get to my destination just a few seconds faster than I would have if I had chosen the wrong lane. Or, god forbid, I might actually arrive a minute or two later, if I had the misfortune to not get around someone slow.

    A minute or two. 120 seconds. 120 SECONDS. What is that really, in the long span of our lives? Why is it so important that we gain those few seconds/minutes? Is that time really that precious? Is there really anything to gain by getting someplace that much faster? Really? 10 seconds? 20 seconds? Heck, 5 whole minutes? And most of the time we are driving a little bit less than safely (dare I say recklessly) to accomplish this. So, gaining 30 seconds is worth the risk we took in trying to slide our way in front a line of cars in the slow lane right before getting off at our exit. Why? Why is it so important? Why does it matter? Everything seems like this. Got to hurry hurry hurry. No time to stop, no time to think, no time to enjoy or care about those around us. When did rushing become so darn important? So much so that even 5 seconds seems worthwhile? Why the rush? WHY?

    Here's hoping that I can continue to ask myself this every time I get antsy about what lane to be in, and how quickly I can get around that slow person I see several cars ahead. That I will come to the conclusion that a few seconds really doesn't matter...and that that is all I really am saving.

    Wednesday, June 30, 2010

    Warning: Construction!

    Just a heads up that you may see some changes on this blog...mainly with the title. I want more than just basic text, so I am having my graphics-savvy husband experiment with some ideas for an actual logo/image. Some of them may get applied to the blog as he/I/we try them out, so I apologize if it gets dizzying to see a new title logo each time you check out my blog. Hopefully we'll have something by the end of the holiday weekend. In the meantime, just bear with me. And maybe put on a hardhat. heh.

    Sunday, June 27, 2010

    Too much stuff

    I have way too much stuff.

    Throughout the years, I have collected a lot of personal belongings, some useful, but some not so much. All stuff I once thought I wanted, or was given. And it's all cluttering my home. And I am tired of it. Tired of owning so much stuff. Why do I need it all? Am I really going to use some of it? Do I need all of it? Some of it I bought myself long time ago. Some of if was stuff I asked for. Some of it's stuff that was given as a well-meaning gift. And some is just stuff that somehow has gotten into the house (yeah, like it just snuck in here, right?). Why is it still here? Because I have a problem with getting rid of things. Some are things that have some sort of sentimental value (and some of those are worth keeping). Some are things that people gave me that I just can't bear to give away, because I don't want them to feel bad now that I no longer want it. Some are things I would gladly give away but can't bear to just toss in the trash because they are still useful/usable and I would rather someone got some use out of it instead of it ending up in a landfill (anyone need a VHS/DVD cabinet, or a simple desk?), but I don't know of how to find a new home for them.

    Regardless, it drives me crazy that I have this much STUFF in my possession. And I realized that I don't really want any more stuff. Seriously. I don't want people to buy me more things for my birthday or the holidays. If people really want to get something, I think I would get far more use out of something that pampers me (like gift certificates for massages or spa treatments, or towards my yoga center, etc). Yummy foods that are gone once I use them. I really don't want material things anymore, adding to the clutter of my home, and my life. (okay, okay...yarn. I won't say no to yarn...GOOD yarn, though...not the cheap Red Heart stuff). I want so much to get up the willpower to just get rid of the stuff that I really don't want around my house/life anymore...but in the meantime, I guess this is sort of a message to those around me that...um...don't get me anything anymore. Really...I am saying it now, so it can sink in before the holidays...no stuff. Unless I REALLY ask for it (like yarn). And maybe you should look around YOUR home and ask yourself...do you want any of my stuff? *heh*

    Monday, June 21, 2010

    Summer Solstice

    Today is the Summer Solstice (at least in the Northern Hemisphere). From Latin sol, meaning sun, and sistere, to stand still, it marks the instant when the Earth is at its maximum axial tilt towards the sun and the sun seems to come to a stop before reversing direction. On this day, we experience the longest period of daylight. The sun brings us warmth, light, life, so it seems like a good day to stop and stand still and enjoy the sunshine. Well, at least for a few minutes...it IS a pretty hot day.